Reality

I probably shouldn't blog right now because I am viewing the world through an exhausted body with a negative mind, but since I'm not one to hold back too much, here goes...
I have said several times since we got home from vacation that I feel like I was slapped in the face with reality. Last week wasn't really that bad, I had Monday off work because the little boys I watch were sick so I was able to catch up on laundry and get ready for the week. Jeremy started his summer quarter and I think that made all my fears of busyness catch me off guard. This quarter he has one 12 hour clinical and three days with classes and he is still working three 12 hours shifts at the hospital. So, needless to say he is busy! That means I am busy! By Friday of last week I was ready for a restful weekend with the boys, even turning down a 24 hour trip to Lakeside. Little did I know that Jake would wake up with a fever in the middle of the night. There went restful! His highest fever was 103.5 and he was very lethargic and his skin was red all over. After a good nap and some medicine he was back to smiling, as long as he had Ibuprofen in him! We did get to call Jeremy at work at 2:30 in the morning, just to say hi. That doesn't happen too often. We were up, playing with toys in the dark and eating snacks.
This week I am watching all the kids during the day and I am also attending four, four hour classes in the evening to be state certified to provide childcare for Chelsea, Jeremy's little sister. I am glad I will have these classes behind me, I just wish I had energy to do all this!
I have whined enough. We have also had some great times this last week. Last night Austin and I sat outside on the hammock for about an hour. We just talked and laughed and I think I could have stayed there with him all night. He amazes me with his knowledge and thoughtfulness. One day this week he said "Mom, you sure do have your hands full." I had just changed a diaper and was about to prepare dinner. Another day in the car he was asking Jeremy and I about preschool and kindergarten. He was quiet for a few minutes and then he said "When I start kindergarten, Jake will be two years old!" I was surprised that he was sitting there thinking about others and how he affects them. I just want to hold on to these crazy, chaotic, somehow perfect moments, forever... and I'll stop whining to you now!